Flashback Pickup Lines: Torts

I feel guilty for my lack of posts this semester, and have already gotten one request for the triumphant return of my lame-ass pick-up lines. Since I haven't started studying for my finals for this semester, and since I didn't start my pickup line thing until Spring semester of my 1L year... I will be going back and thinking up lines for those classes which were left behind from my 1L Fall semester: Namely, Torts and Contracts. Today, Torts... later this week Contracts (and maybe Trial Practice)

So here they are... some lame Torts pickup lines (remember, lame pickup lines)

"I'm going to put my hand on your ass. I know it's not battery because you'll consent to the contact."

"You wanna come back to my place. We can play 'false imprisonment' with my love cuffs."

[Dirty] "Your body has definitely proximately caused me to get hard."

"If you slap me, I'll be privilege to use self-defense and kiss you."

"Baby, you're being negligent by wearing that fine-ass dress in public. You're creating an unreasonable risk of sexiness up in here."

"You've committed an assault on my heart, because I have an apprehension of falling for you."

"A reasonably purdent person can't help but want to get with you."

"I may be negligent by 'accidently' groping you... but you *have* to be contributorily negligent for looking so fine."

[Dirty Again] "I'd tell you how big my dick is, but res ipsa loquitur."

Enjoy.